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LynW
#1 Posted : Wednesday, May 26, 2010 1:12:00 PM Quote
Rank: Advanced Member

Groups: Registered

Joined: 12/4/2009
Posts: 2,127
Location: Thornton Cleveleys
Hello!

I wish I wasn’t in this position and having to write this post but unfortunately it is the case.

I use this forum for two reasons mainly. One, because I enjoy the company offered by some of the friendliest people I have ever come across; the fun, the support and genuine kindness is, I feel, unique. Secondly, with 22 years of living with RA I feel able to understand and empathise with many of the problems brought to our discussions; my knowledge is founded on my personal experiences of medication, some surgical procedures and day to day living with this chronic disease. I bring with it many years of management experience and likewise time spent in voluntary counselling work. I have also written hundreds of articles for various publications on a variety of topics.

You may well ask why I am telling you this. Indeed, a very fair question.

Today I have received an anonymous email. It has come from a forum user, either one who posts or one who only reads. It is certainly not someone to whom I have willingly given my email address and I can only think it has been picked up from the forum. It is undoubtedly my fault for posting it in a public area but I removed it some weeks ago on the advice of friends.

The email is both unpleasant and upsetting. I cannot begin to imagine why anyone would wish to do such a thing. I am really sorry if it has been felt that I am criticising anyone that has never been the case. I’m sorry if my responses have on occasion made others reluctant to post. That definitely wasn’t my intention. Reflecting back perhaps if anything my posts have been over informative but written in a way that I hoped would provide support where it was needed.

Where to go from here? I suggest that if the person concerned wishes to discuss the issues raised they email me again with their name. I would welcome the opportunity to clarify the situation. If I don’t get a response I will take this further and the original email will be forwarded to someone who can help with its identification. For the next few days I am not going to post but I will continue to read through the threads.

To newcomers I just want to say that this is clearly a personal issue. Please don’t feel restricted in your posts because majority of the people on this forum are truly lovely people. I have now met quite a few of them and each one has been so supportive and genuine. You are amongst friends here; value that companionship.

Lyn x


My son, Ian, completed the BUPA Great North Run on 15th September running for the National Rheumatoid Arthritis Society (NRAS). You can read his story at http://www.justgiving.com/ianlukewilson

dorat
#2 Posted : Wednesday, May 26, 2010 1:46:59 PM Quote
Rank: Advanced Member


Groups: Registered

Joined: 12/3/2009
Posts: 3,157
Location: Huddersfield
Hi Lyn,

I'm so sorry this has happened to you.
I hope you are going to take this further because it has happened before, I don't know if it's the same person sending the e-mails but the recipients chose not to report it.
There must be something to identify the sender. If you forward it to NRAS they will have everyone's e-mail address and hopefully be able to see who has sent it.
It should be reported and whoever is sending these e-mails should be dealt with.

Sending you love and hugs Lyn. As far as I am concerned you have done nothing to deserve such treatment.

Love, Doreenxx
Blue Star
#3 Posted : Wednesday, May 26, 2010 2:07:33 PM Quote
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Joined: 12/3/2009
Posts: 561
O Lyn , just to say i have always found your posts really helpful and you definitely know your stuff concerning RA , who ever is sending these emails is obviously trying to course trouble and upset , i dont even want to put my email address on now in case i get sent one !
Please dont stop posting ,
Sophie x
benmaise
#4 Posted : Wednesday, May 26, 2010 2:48:21 PM Quote
Rank: Advanced Member


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Joined: 12/3/2009
Posts: 263
Hello Lyn , I always enjoy reading your posts . I cant understand why anyone would want to be nasty to you. You have made me feel better about some things i have been worried about so dont stop posting please. Iwould miss you and so would many others . Kathleen Mc. xx
Mandy_M
#5 Posted : Wednesday, May 26, 2010 2:57:24 PM Quote
Rank: Advanced Member

Groups: Registered

Joined: 12/7/2009
Posts: 176
I too am sorry that you have rec'd an anonymous e-mail - a cowardly thing to do. I have found your responses, and offerings, both to the point and helpful. Please do follow it up. Cyber-Bullying can now be classed as an illegal activity under some circumstance.
volfram
#6 Posted : Wednesday, May 26, 2010 3:24:43 PM Quote
Rank: Advanced Member

Groups: Registered

Joined: 12/5/2009
Posts: 119
Location: warrington
Hi Lynn
I don't tend to post a lot but like to read and to me your posts come across as very informative. you are the kind of person we need on here so please don't stop posting for the sake of one person who can't even give you a name. come back on now.
sue xx
monty
#7 Posted : Wednesday, May 26, 2010 3:39:14 PM Quote
Rank: Advanced Member


Groups: Registered

Joined: 12/5/2009
Posts: 216
Location: Leicester, UK
Dear Lyn,

PLEASE REPORT THIS TO NRAS ! They will be able to trace the sender. Your posts are kind, helpful, caring and most informative. We do not need these sort of people on our forum and they should be stopped immediately. Don't stop posting - that means this person has made an impact on your life and they are really not worth that !!

I am SO cross that I'm spitting fire.Mad

Warmest wishes, Ann
"I cannot do everything. I accept that. Not being able to do everything is no excuse for doing nothing." ~ Helen Keller
Joanne C
#8 Posted : Wednesday, May 26, 2010 3:45:59 PM Quote
Rank: Advanced Member


Groups: Registered

Joined: 12/3/2009
Posts: 357
Dear Lyn,

I'm fuming at this, please forward the email (with the headers if possible) to NRAS, we all have RA on here and try to do what we can to help each other, getting unpleasant anonymous emails doesn't help anyone.

Please don't stop posting and please do send the mail on to NRAS

Best wishes

Jo.
2012 Fundraising for the National Rheumatoid Arthritis Society (NRAS) http://uk.virginmoneygiving.com/RoboJo
Lorna-A
#9 Posted : Wednesday, May 26, 2010 3:51:59 PM Quote
Rank: Advanced Member


Groups: Registered

Joined: 3/8/2010
Posts: 914
Hi Lyn,

What a cowardly thing to do, there are some really low people around. You are a truly lovely person and I for one like reading your posts. You have been very helpful to me in some posts too. My husband is in computers and I told him , he said you can find out where it came from via the source of the email. If you would like him to help trace the email where it came from send me a message via Nras and he will try to help. Do not delete the original email. Don't let some nasty person stop you posting. Your a Star and we all need you. See my post for you on Dr Hillary . ThumpUp Rise above this Lyn you don't deserve this. Carry on being very helpful we all need you. Lorna xx
jeanb
#10 Posted : Wednesday, May 26, 2010 4:05:09 PM Quote
Rank: Advanced Member


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Joined: 12/3/2009
Posts: 3,006
Location: Timperley
Hi Lyn

Thanks for your e-mail-be back to you later.

I'm just gobsmacked. If someone has anything to say, they should have the guts to put their name to it. This is a such cowardly thing to do.

As for you leaving the forum - DON'T. You'd very much missed by all your friends and I'd probably have a hissy fit!

However, you've had such a bad week this week, I can understand your thinking. This is definitely one thing you don't need right now.

I agree that this should be sent to NRAS for the sender to be identified.

Take care, lovely Lyn

Much love
Jeanxxxx
tina-M
#11 Posted : Wednesday, May 26, 2010 4:16:23 PM Quote
Rank: Advanced Member

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Joined: 12/4/2009
Posts: 335
Hi
I to had this problem a while back and it is not nice when they do it, but they are not worth it,
hope u find out who it is
xxx Tina
jeanb
#12 Posted : Wednesday, May 26, 2010 4:39:48 PM Quote
Rank: Advanced Member


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Joined: 12/3/2009
Posts: 3,006
Location: Timperley
Oh gosh, Tina - I remember this now. Did you send the e-mail to NRAS?
lots of love
Jeanxxxx
barbara-o
#13 Posted : Wednesday, May 26, 2010 4:45:54 PM Quote
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Joined: 12/3/2009
Posts: 690
Dearest Lyn,

My stomach churned when I read your post. I can't understand the spitefulness of some people and how they could with a clear conscience steep so low as to write something this upsetting. In fact, I am deeply concerned about this individual's mental well-being and left wondering whether they need help? If you are this person and reading this post, PLEASE seek HELP, as there are organisations available to support you through whatever problems you may have.

Lyn, please don't stop posting your support is invaluable and I would miss you!

love,

Barbara
XXXXXX
JulieM
#14 Posted : Wednesday, May 26, 2010 5:22:06 PM Quote
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Joined: 12/4/2009
Posts: 1,524
Location: W. Yorkshire
Lyn, I hate to read about things like this happening. I really don't understand where this person is coming from. Your posts are intelligent and well informed posts.
I'm aware it has happened to other folk on here but I don't know if it's the same person or not obviously.
YES I'VE CHANGED, PAIN DOES THAT TO PEOPLE.
prioryc
#15 Posted : Wednesday, May 26, 2010 5:24:29 PM Quote
Rank: Advanced Member

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Joined: 12/3/2009
Posts: 854
Dear Lyn,

I am shocked to hear about this. Being objective, here is no other advice re this matter that I would give to you apart from forwarding the e mail directly to NRAS. They will be able to find out who sent the email by some method. If not, it is a police matter and they should be consulted. You are not the first member who has been attacked in such a cowardly way, apart from Tina another member who is on holiday at present had one a few weeks ago. I don't think that either of them took it further but the time has come to have this person identified and their issues raised with professionals. I agree with Barbara, the person concerned may well have a health problem apart from RA and need help.

Subjectively, I am so sorry that you have become a target for this disgusting form of abuse. Please forward to NRAS then allow them to deal with it. Do not let this stop you doing what you, I and all the other members, with few exceptions, offer to each other ie support, friendship and advice based on years of having this nasty, painful condition with its many other travelling companions. This sorry individual must not stop any of us carrying on doing that and you especially have helped us all at one time or another. Can I suggest that you post as normal and accept some support and advice from us all in return. I have had the pleasure of meeting you and am livid that this person could even consider doing such a nasty, cruel, spiteful thing to you.

I have not been on the forum so much this year as you know because of my own serious health hiccup but intend to be on regularly now as no one has the right to be nasty to any other member and/or chase them off the forum which is here to provide mutual support to us all.

DO NOT STOP POSTING: THE MAJORITY MUST RULE AND IT IS ONE PERSON WHO IS LETTING THE OTHER MEMBERS DOWN. THAT PERSON MUST NOT BE ALLOWED TO CHASE ANY OTHER MEMBER AWAY.

I will e mail you later my friend. Sending you lots of love and sorrow that this should have been directed at you.

Eleanor x
FIONA752
#16 Posted : Wednesday, May 26, 2010 5:43:20 PM Quote
Rank: Advanced Member


Groups: Registered

Joined: 12/4/2009
Posts: 312
Dear Lyn, I felt shocked when I read of the malicious email
being sent to you. Especially the person not putting their name to it!
Please keep posting.
Best wishes,
Fiona
anne_t
#17 Posted : Wednesday, May 26, 2010 6:06:06 PM Quote
Rank: Advanced Member

Groups: Registered

Joined: 12/3/2009
Posts: 302
Location: Rainham Kent
Dear Lyn, I am truly shocked at what you are saying. You are one of the most informative and helpful people on the forum with tact and advice for us all, yet you are coping with your own problems(who isn't). power to your elbow, if it doesn't hurt too much. Long may you continue . Good Luck with the hospital as well. Kind regards Anne
tina-M
#18 Posted : Wednesday, May 26, 2010 6:22:25 PM Quote
Rank: Advanced Member

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Joined: 12/4/2009
Posts: 335
no jean they emailed me eather some one told them or they lol
but i did get an appology but some times it to late once u done the damage aint it, i so hope he gets one why do people have to try and spoil things for others .
Julia17
#19 Posted : Wednesday, May 26, 2010 6:35:03 PM Quote
Rank: Advanced Member


Groups: Registered

Joined: 2/18/2010
Posts: 1,098
Location: farningham kent
Dear Lyn

I have just read your post and very upset about the whole matter. Your advice on here is absolutely invaluable, what more can I say. ( As soon as you return, better be soon ! I need your advice about my tendons my consultant seems a bit loss on this one )

Much love Julia xx

amanda_lewin
#20 Posted : Wednesday, May 26, 2010 7:45:58 PM Quote
Rank: Advanced Member


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Joined: 12/3/2009
Posts: 1,582
Location: Oxfordshire
Dear LYN,

I know we have 'chatted' but I just want to say; you are so special and so lovely and absolutely no one will be allowed to get away with this type of behaviour.

Mark will trace the address for you if you like after you hear from NRAS. The person whoever you are needs to leave immediately.

I really do not know how some people sleep easy at night.

Much love to you,

Amanda
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